Fall Cleaning

“Dear children of my heart – I love you to the moon and back. But the next one I see putting something in the microwave without covering it will be cleaning the microwave. With your tongue. Love – your mama that spent approximately 15 hours cleaning before finding that science experiment.”

That was the note I considered posting in my kitchen today. Yikes. And Yuck. But it’s clean now. So is the rest of the house. My husband flew out yesterday morning (and back this afternoon) so I took two days off work to deep clean the house. Our 15 year old asked me if it was to “surprise Dad or just because you’re frustrated with the house?” Yes. That. The second one. Because I hadn’t cleaned – really cleaned – in months. And while my husband doesn’t mind as long as it’s not unsanitary, I get to the point where I don’t want to be in my own house. I kinda wish I had taken before & after pictures. But honestly, I’m not sure we’re close enough for you to see those befores. We have three boys, a dog and a cat. And when I say “dog”, I mean a 95 lb German Shepherd – aka German Shedder. Good lord. So.Much.Hair. I steam cleaned the carpets and it was GROSS. I swear when she dies I’m not ever getting another dog.

I’m also a dirty rotten liar. I’ll cave at the first semi-cute canine to look up at me.

Also, that dog doesn’t like change much. And she gets nervous when Dad is gone. And he was gone. And there was a lot of change and noise and unknowns happening. And? She farts when she gets nervous. A lot. And I don’t mean “oh does that doggy woggy have gassy wassy?” little farts. No. These are “omg where’s my gas mask I can’t breathe” chemical warfare level farts.

All in all it was an interesting two days. The carpets have been steam cleaned. The bathroom closet was organized, the entire room scrubbed and the ceiling mopped. Our room was totally organized & cleaned. The kitchen – scrubbed. The oven was cleaned. I CLEANED THE OVEN PEOPLE!! Who has TIME for that normally? Not I. But I do believe I’ll be taking time off at least twice a year now to do this. Because my house? It is CLEAN. For at least a couple of hours. I even decorated for fall. No one else in the family cares. At all. But I do. And I’m damn proud of myself.

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